Loralyn Mears, PhD
MONDAY MOTIVATION: CHANGE YOUR PERSPECTIVE
This article was originally published on October 21, 2019 at https://gritdaily.com/monday-motivation-change-your-perspective/

Monday Motivation here we come! We see you – coffee cup in hand, trudging through the rain on an early dark morning cursing your commute. Don’t worry, we’ve got your back!
This column is for those of you who slog through your Monday mornings. If you lament the end of the weekend and dread returning to the office, you may need our Monday Motivation quick tips. Studies show that your morning mood affects your productivity all day. And nobody wants to go through their day like an unmotivated, unproductive sourpuss, right?
Grit Daily offers an avenue to connect with others like you. We’re here to help get your work week off to a good start. Pump your fists – it’s time for Monday Motivation.
LOOK UP NOT DOWN
Body language says more than all the words from even the most loquacious individuals. Looking down can indicate a lack of trustworthiness and suggest that you are hiding something. It can also signify a lack of confidence or a willful act of submission. None of these behaviors are ones to be proud of. But you may not even be aware of the messages that you’re sending.
A bonus of looking up is that you will see the “big picture.” Literally. The sky is expansive. Whether it be blue, punctuated with swirling clouds of white and rays of sunshine or dark, gloomy, gray and wet, it’s enormous relative to you. Looking up will remind you that there is so much more out there and whatever issue that you singularly fixated on, perhaps even myopically, it will pass.
In the grand scheme of life, or even within a day through sunset and sunrise, things will be slightly different if you work at how you see them. And, even more importantly, if you take the steps that you need to, however small, even taking one step at a time, your situation will change. That’s how Monday motivation works. One morning, one day, one week at a time. String together a series of Mondays and then it won’t be long before you see a shift.
Our Monday motivational inspirational leader teaches us that it’s not about when you wake up, it’s about how you wake up. The first things that you do every morning will set the course for your day. Indeed, it’s all a matter of perspective.
TIPS TO CHANGE YOUR PERSPECTIVE
Changing your perspective so that you see things from someone else’s point of view is a soft skill, also known as “EQ” (emotional intelligence) which must be learned. And practiced. Finding a means of regulating your emotions will influence how others perceive you, as well as how you feel about your behaviors, productivity and overall success day-to-day. It’s a form of mindfulness anchored in compassion and empathy for how we view others and equally reflective of how others may view us.
Our emotions give us away. No matter how good we are at hiding how we truly feel, there are always tell-tale signs such as how our eyes dart or look away, or how our posture is slumped, we look unkempt and just reek of “I’m having a bad day.” What we don’t say will be said for us if we don’t regroup and change our perspective. Here, Monday motivation can help change your mindset so that you look forward to your day (and week) versus dread it.
#1 – LOOK UP TO HOLD BACK YOUR TEARS
This is one of those extra special tips that I’ve acquired along the way that stands out. Let’s call this one a super-duper-tip. There are times, particularly for women, when we feel especially vulnerable and sensitive. A poor night’s sleep and/or extenuating circumstances can easily push us over the emotional edge. And why is it that annual performance reviews or break-up discussions always seem to happen with perfect storm timing?
If you don’t want to cry, look up. Doing so redirects the pooling teardrops to collect in the middle of the bottom of your eye versus the corners. Hence it’s less likely that they’ll drip down your cheeks. Also, the physical action of tilting your head up and arching your neck forces a mental pause and gives you that moment you need to collect yourself and redirect your thoughts.
#2 – GIVE IT SOME TIME
For the impatient among us, being told to give the situation some time, sleep on it, don’t send that text or email in the heat of the moment, etc., just adds fuel to the fire. Asking someone to wait for something that they want to immediately resolve is torture. But giving a situation a little time to breathe allows you to self-regulate your emotions, to process how you feel and make a conscious versus involuntary decision as to how you want others to perceive you.
#3 – FIND A ROLE MODEL
Is there someone whom you know personally or know of vicariously through a podcast, reality show or whatever source that you’d like to be more like? Your role model doesn’t even have to be a real person. The only requirement is that that role model exhibit characteristic traits and behaviors, consistently, that you feel are positive and worth emulating.
If you’re stuck in a rut and don’t see the escape path, pause. Take the time out needed to do the work and process why you’re feeling what you feel. Don’t invalidate your own feelings! There are plenty of turds out there in the world who will do that for you. Instead, try to understand why you feel the way that you do and what can you do, even one small thing, to start making changes? Most importantly, since this is Monday motivation, you need to believe that you can change.
WHO MOTIVATES YOU?
It’s been a while since we featured a Monday motivation role model here so it’s time to bring this column feature back. Without a doubt, Mel Robbins is the coaches’ coach. She’s a force to be reckoned with her no-nonsense straight-up advice. It’s no surprise that she is one of the most highly influential coaches on the planet today, booked just about daily for a motivational keynote address, has one of the most-viewed TED talks of all time (“How to Stop Screwing Yourself Over”) with nearly 21 million views. And she has legions of devoted followers for good reason. She encourages all of us to harness activation energy and just get. It. Done.
“It’s simple but not easy. You need to force yourself OUT of your head. Move past your feelings. It’s about what you want not how you feel. Get outside of your comfort zone.” ~Mel Robbins

ACTIVATION ENERGY – JUST FIND IT
Robbins has recently debuted her own TV show which is designed to bring that same level of candor to the masses through everyday experiences and situations. Her newest book, The 5 Second Rule, underscores the importance of taking action – and changing your perspective – as soon as the thought to do so enters your head. If you don’t, she argues that the thought will slip away and you will not take action. Five seconds is all that you have at any given moment to transform your life.
One of her other rules centers around not taking notes at meetings. As an avid note-taker, I will struggle with this one. But, one change at a time brings change, so I’m going to try it. They say that you need to try things for 3 weeks until they become a habit. That’s not a long time and worth trying.
So, now that you’ve made it all the way through to the end of our Monday motivation column (assuming that you didn’t skip over the good bits in the middle), how are you going to change your perspective today?